It's a beautiful day in Sunnydale. The sun is shining - blanketing the earth in warmth and brilliant light; the sweet melody of birds chirping playfully can be heard in the distance, and a petite slayer is pinned to a nearby oak tree by an ooiee-gooiee creature from the black lagoon. *C'mon, you didn't think the Hellmouth could pull off the concept of serenity, now did you?* It seems that the three stooges have decided to embark on a picnicing adventure (hell-ish demon included) After slicing and dicing (actually it was pretty much a stab'n'go kinda deal) the "ick" factor, Buffy and friends talk about the trials and tribulations of their love lives, which, as of late, have been reduced to a void of nothingness.

Meanwhile, the Cord-ster vents her anger on any and all Xander memorabilia (who knew she was a pyros?) while emptying the tear ducts and sobbing her poor, shallow heart out.

Now as if this would last too long? Before you can say, "Rodeo Drive" Cordy is back in action as the determined vixen she once was. Draped in dark leather and plastered in Maybelline, the artist formerly known as a slayerette arrives at school to be mocked, teased and pretty much downright humiliated. After Harmony and her fellow "sheep" have a go at the newly rejected chica, Cordelia turns to her new confidante, Anya (now you know what this means folks - new character getting aqquainted with a perma-character..uhhuh, it just spells "b-a-d-d-y").

Cordelia still manages to choke back her sensitive side and goes full force with the flirting shtick that night at the Bronze. After successfully rubbing her abilities in Xander's face, she slips out the back exit in obvious pain (I guess getting shish-ka-bobbed by a railroad spike can do that to ya). Buffy follows her in hopes of offering some much needed comfort, but sadly for Cordelia she gets into a rummble with a john-doe vamp who catapults Cordy into a nerby dumpster.

Perhaps I should go into more of an explanation before I jump into the juicy stuff. Well, it would seem that Cordy has regained her social status without the Slayer around, but sadly urban life has changed drastically, with a mandatory monthly memorial service, curfew for students (you wouldn't want to be stuck on a dark street with a surplus of vamps and no heroine to save you, now would you?) and a lack of a mortal Willow and Xander. As un-luck would have it, Cordy runs into a much paler Xander on the streets who is happily greeted by his partner in crime, the leather-clad-Willow. After clueing in to their vampy-ness (a tad too late I might add), the "white hats" (Giles, Oz, Larry and some unknown chica) show up toting crosses to scare away the baddies and get our bright-clothing-clad-slayerette to safety.

Now this is going to be incredibely long if I don't speed things up a little. Cordelia clues the now non-watcher Giles into the fact that life was supposed to be different with Buffy around. Giles is taken aback and decides to go into research mode (something he hasn't been doing for a verrry long time). The twisted duo (Willow and Xander) show up to lock Giles in the library cage and suck the liveliness out of Cordy (which was the Master's order to do so - oops, did I forget to mention that The Master is back in force and taking refuge at the newly converted underworld club which was formerly known as "The Bronze"? My bad!) It seems that the master-of-hell-mouthyness is making plans for a blood-draining factory which will change the vamp-nutrition-diet forever!

Giles sends for Buffy who is currently scoring up the good points in Cleveland *yayyy Indians!* while Willow plays with the "family pet" (none other than a chained up and world weery Angel). I won't go into great detail on this one considering the "ouch factor" on Angel's part, let's just say that black and blue are his two least favorite colours at this time. Skipping ahead, Buffy arrives (complete with a scarred lip, long braided hair, and lack of femininity) to save Giles from being attacked by a gang of blood suckers. Our tough-as-nails Slayer decides to make some use of her spare time and knock off the Master, while Giles plays book-man and finds a way to change the Genie's (Anya's) curse by destroying her "power center" *remember the emerald green necklace?*

Buffy saunters through a deserted Bronze to find Angel locked in his dungeon. In the midst of her ignorance, Angel recognizes Buffy and proceeds to explain to her how she was supposed to be his destiny. Warily, Buffy consents to releasing him so he can take her to the Master's factory and stop the ceremony. *Wouldn't you go too if this more-than-yummy-vamp-guy flashed you his battered chest in an attempt to show you his pain and torment? Even the new and not-so-improved Buffster can't resist a good show of pectoral muscles. Oops, silly me, I'm off topic*

Upon arriving at the factory and witnessing the Master's blood sucking invention, Buffy fires a crossbow which hits Xander in the abdomen. All hell breaks loose (and I do use this term in the literal sense) and one by one the Slayerettes are knocked off. For those with a verrry morbid sense of humour I'll explain. Angel tries to save Buffy from the wrath of Xander and takes the pointy end of the stick instead. With a final word, "Buffy!" he turns into dust as Buffy stalks stealthily through his ashes to skewer Xander. Oz forces his not-so-beloved Willow onto a protruding piece of wood and the Master turns Buffy's neck a full 360 degree angle.

Now as if things could end this way? Giles conjures up Anya and manages to bust her jewel which, with a flash of blinding light, turns Sunnydale life as we know it, back to normal (or as normal as it gets). The birds are once again chirping, the sun is once again shining, ikkee monsters are once again roaming, and no one bats an eyelash. How's that for selective memory?

Hehehe...I loved this ep - it shows just how important Buffy is to Sunnydale, I think!!! It's too bad Cordelia didn't remember it all though...respect for Buffy is something she lacks, I'm thinkin'!! Ah well...and welcome back to Kendra, too - *I* was the one that ended up lacking time to do the summary, but fortunately she managed to drum one up for me! yay! =)